So, Azariah and I went for a standard check-up at a GUM clinic the other day. We were both at the same clinic, at the same time, but had two very different experiences.
I saw a lovely female doctor, who was very approachable, easy to chat to, didn't bat an eyelid to the mention of non-heteronormative partners/sex acts, and explained very clearly what tests were going to be done, how they'd all work, and gave me the option of getting a Hep B vaccination. Then I had all of the oh-so-fun fun tests, which were made so much more easy and comfortable by the fact that the doctor and nurse were both friendly and chatty, talking to me in a completely normal, everyday way. Because looking after sexual health is a normal thing to do.
Azariah went in after me and saw a different doctor. She asked him about previous sexual partners and upon him mentioning that he'd been with man, she said "oh!" in a surprised voice. She also asked if he was "active or passive" - erm, what? Active or passive? I'm assuming she meant giving or receiving, because surely it'd be rather hard to be passive in a sex act... She then asked about other sexual partners, and he mentioned me as his long term partner. When he mentioned I was female, she raised her eyebrow rather judgingly and didn't seem to understand at first. She then said ok (again, in a very surprised way), and asked if I knew about his other encounters. Because obviously she needed to help Azariah in the way the communication in his relationship was run.
He was asked to take his trousers down, and was then left on the bed while she left the room for almost 5 minutes. The nurse had to come in and explain to him what the tests were, as he'd never had these done before and the doctor hadn't said anything. He wasn't offered the vaccine, he was just given it. It was assumed that because he'd been with a man he was obviously now high-risk.
I came out of the clinic really inspired by my doctor, really wanting to go into sexual health or education to help people, whereas Azariah came out feeling judged, sore from tests that didn't need to be painful (he said he felt the doctor was being punishing for having sex she didn't agree with) and not exactly keen to go again.
Also I was given an anonymous feedback sheet from my doctor to fill out about her professional conduct, how well things were explained to me, etc whereas Azariah was not.
I feel so angry that someone so judgemental and unhelpful could work in a sexual health clinic, somewhere where people of all ages might turn up feeling vulnerable, ashamed, scared, and a whole host of other emotions, and hope to be treated with respect by a professional. It's increased my desire to work in sex education in some way, to somehow try and increase the amount ofprofessional, approachable people they encounter, or at least send them to places like this with as much knowledge about what will happen as possible.
You'd think that in a GUM clinic they'd have better sensitivity training!
ReplyDeleteClearly Azariah came across a rogue idiot, as you are legally required to gain consent for thingslike injections.
I think you should encourage him to write a formal complaint about the way he was treated - totally unacceptable.
Also, when I went for a screening last, all they needed to do the screening was a urine sample (i'm male,) I didn't have to disrobe at all.
Whilst having a threshold statistically for certain behaviours being more at risk and therefore being more careful/following different policies is a standard in medicine, there is supposed to be non-judgemental informed explanation and consent throughout.
Yeah, you'd have thought so wouldn't you! *sigh*
DeleteWell he was told that he'd be given a hep b jab (which I imagine he said 'ok' to), but not asked if he wanted one, and given the reasons, pros and cons etc as I was. I doubt very much that he came across as a 'rogue idiot' - he's generally a very clued-up, articulate, and straight forward kind of guy. The difference in our treatment came purely from the different doctors we had: the nurse was the same with both of us - very helpful and professional. His doctor just seemed a little less tolerant (or at least assumed that patients were heterosexual and monogomous until they said otherwise, and acted very surprised when they weren't). She was older, which might have had something to do with this attitude, but it certainly didn't help to put Azariah at ease.
I was considering doing this myself. I'll put it to him and see if he wants to do this.
Well what tests are done obviously depends upon the activities engaged in - Azariah had a urethral swab, anal swab, and I think a throat one. I don't remember if he also had to do a urine sample at all.
I reaise that this is what's supposed to happen, but all too often it just isn't the case. I was pleasantly surprised by the manner of the doctor I had, which really shouldn't be the case - it should be the norm, and what's expected from somewhere like that.
I think the other Anon poster meant the Dr was a rogue idiot, not Azariah
ReplyDelete*Rereads* - Yes you're right, I misread that. Sorry about that!
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